Skip to content
Catholic Online Logo

By Catholic Online (NEWS CONSORTIUM)

2/5/2014 (2 years ago)

Catholic Online (www.catholic.org)

'Parents are so nave' - one convicted child molester says

With the heightened awareness of the sexual abuse of children, the question arises: How do these inhuman monsters gain access to children? Gregory M. Weber, Assistant Attorney General for the State of Wisconsin, says that the process involves "grooming" the intended victim - in addition to his parents and caregivers. "He'll gain the child's trust, break down his defenses, and manipulate him into performing or permitting the desired sex act," Weber says. 

Many molesters use a combination of forced teaming and charm.

Many molesters use a combination of forced teaming and charm.

Highlights

By Catholic Online (NEWS CONSORTIUM)

Catholic Online (www.catholic.org)

2/5/2014 (2 years ago)

Published in Marriage & Family

Keywords: Child molestation, grooming, sexual predators


LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - "The process is called grooming. It increases the predator's access to his victim and decreases the likelihood of discovery," Weber adds.

Psychologist Anna C. Salter, an expert in the field of child sexual maltreatment say the process is a slow and gradual one. "The establishment (and eventual betrayal) of affection and trust occupies a central role in the child molester's interactions with children . The grooming process often seems similar from offender to offender, largely because it takes little to discover that emotional seduction is the most effective way to manipulate children."

One convicted child abuser states it plainly: "[P]arents are so naive-they're worried about strangers and should be worried about their brother-in-law. They just don't realize how devious we can be. I used to abuse children in the same room with their parents and they couldn't see it or didn't seem to know it was happening."

Carry a reminder of Our Savior with us always!


He explained his horrific modus operandi: "I was disabled and spent months grooming the parents, so they would tell their children to take me out and help me. No one thought that disabled people could be abusers."

He adds that parents must educate their children on such matters. "Parents shouldn't be embarrassed to talk about things like this-it's harder to abuse or trick a child who knows what you're up to."

In explaining the grooming process, Weber says that it "begins when the predator chooses a target area. He may visit places where children are likely to go: schools, shopping malls, playgrounds, parks, and the like. He may work or volunteer at businesses that cater to children. Other predators strike up relationships with adults who have children in the home-single parent families make particularly good targets."

Selecting a victim takes longer, and preys upon the child's special vulnerabilities. "Any child may be victimized. Not surprisingly, predators often target children with obvious vulnerabilities. A child who feels unloved and unpopular will soak up adult attention like a sponge. Children with family problems, who spend time alone and unsupervised, who lack confidence and self-esteem, and who are isolated from their peers are all likely targets.

Many molesters use a combination of forced teaming and charm. "They may offer to play games, give rides, or buy treats and gifts as tokens of friendship. They may offer drugs or alcohol to older children or teenagers. And they almost always offer a sympathetic, understanding ear."

The predator then adds an element of secrecy to the child. For example, they may say, "Here's some candy. But don't tell your friends because they'll be jealous, and don't tell your mother because she won't like you eating between meals."

This is then followed by threats. "If you tell your mother what happened, she'll hate you. It'll kill her. Or I'll kill her. Or I'll kill you."

The forging of an emotional bond through this process leads to physical contact. The first physical contact between predator and victim is often nonsexual touching designed to identify limits: an "accidental" touch, an arm around the shoulder, a brushing of hair.

The best way to recognize grooming behavior is to pay attention to your child and the people in your child's life. "When we blindly surrender responsibility for them to others without question, we invite trouble. Parents should know their child's teachers, coaches, day care providers, youth group leaders, and other significant adults in their lives. Make unannounced visits. Ask questions. Stay involved," Weber says. "And please - talk to your children."

Pope Francis calls for your 'prayer and action'...

---


Pope Francis: end world hunger through 'Prayer and Action'


Copyright 2016 - Distributed by THE CALIFORNIA NETWORK

Pope Francis Prayer Intentions for May 2016
Universal:
Respect for Women: That in every country of the world, women may be honored and respected and that their essential contribution to society may be highly esteemed.
Evangelization: Holy Rosary: That families, communities, and groups may pray the Holy Rosary for evangelization and peace.



Comments


More Marriage & Family

Will South Carolina be able to banish abortions forever? Watch

Image of South Carolina bans abortions after 19 weeks (photosesh).

By Kenya Sinclair (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

South Carolina legislature passed a bill on Tuesday that puts an end to abortions after 19 weeks. Dare we hope the bill is the beginning of the end of abortion? LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - With South Carolina on board, there are seventeen U.S. states banning ... continue reading


How far would YOU go to find happiness? Watch

Image of Indian couple has first child in their 70s (YouTube).

By Kenya Sinclair (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

A 70-year-old woman overcame an infertility with the help of several dead babies and one test tube baby. LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - Daljinder Kaur and her husband Mohinder Singh Gill spent nearly fifty years of marriage unable to conceive.Finally, at roughly ... continue reading


Abortion: Science beats death with ... death? Watch

Image of Which is worse - murdering your unborn child or murdering them before they can get a fighting chance (pregnancyandbaby)?

By Kenya Sinclair (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

Abortion rates have hit a historic low in wealthy countries - but at what cost? LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - To put it bluntly, abortion rates have dropped due to a rise in the use of contraceptives, not because more women have decided that murdering their ... continue reading


First-grader boasts National handwriting award despite having NO HANDS Watch

Image of Anaya Ellick won an award for having the best handwriting despite not having hands (Facebook).

By Kenya Sinclair (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

A 7-year-old girl who was born without hands beat fifty other first-graders in a national handwriting competition, proving anyone can do anything they put their mind to. LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - Rather than accepting prosthetic hands, little Anaya Ellick ... continue reading


Man seeks bizarre RESTRAINING ORDER against God Watch

Image of

By Abigail James (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

In a strange request, an Israeli man has petitioned for a restraining order against God.     LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - Representing himself in court, the unnamed man entered the Haifa Magistrate's Court in Israel and claimed God had been ... continue reading


'The doctors were shocked': Conjoined twins share unusual bond Watch

Image of The girls may be closer than most but they display very different personalities (Caters News Agency).

By Kenya Sinclair (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

A beautiful set of newborn triplets were delivered via C-section at the Tanjungpinang Regional Genearal Hospital in Indonesia. The girls were strong and healthy with ten little toes and ten little fingers each - but there was one little problem: Two of the girls were ... continue reading


The gruesome way scientists are killing unborn babies in school labratories, with the consent of law Watch

Image of A human baby belongs in its mother's womb, not a petri dish or a garbage can.

By Marshall Connolly (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

Scientists have been conducting horrifying experiments on unborn babies, fertilizing eggs and seeing how long before they die in a test tube, outside of the womb. LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - It's sounds like a horrifying lab experiment out of a prequel to ... continue reading


Top 10 Mother's Day gifts to surprise your mom Watch

Image of How will you surprise your mom this Mother's Day?

By Kenya Sinclair (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

Are you tired of giving your mother the same old Mother's Day gifts? How many more pictures does mom really need? Perhaps it's time to stop ordering the same old flowers and move on to something a little more exciting. LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - Moms are not ... continue reading


Top 10 mothers from the Bible Watch

Image of Top 10 Biblical moms (Pinterest).

By Kenya Sinclair (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

Mothers are God's gift to us all. It is mothers who tend to love us with an unbridled passion and who can kiss all our boo-boos away - but what about the mothers of the Bible? LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - The Bible mentions several mothers and each of them teach ... continue reading


Top 12 Bible Verses for Mom Watch

Image of

By Abigail James (CALIFORNIA NETWORK)

The dictionary definition of a mother reads, "Mother: noun. A woman in relation to a child or children to whom she has given birth." However, a mom is so much more than the person who has given birth to the child. LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - Your mom is the one ... continue reading


All Marriage & Family News

Newsletters

Newsletter Sign Up icon

Stay up to date with the latest news, information, and special offers

Subscribe to Catholic OnlineYouTube Channel

the FEED
by Catholic Online

  • St. Mary Magdalene de Pazzi: Saint of the Day for Wednesday, May 25, 2016
  • Prayer to Holy Michael the Archangel HD Video
  • Benedict XVI to make public appearance?
  • Goodbye El Nino! Hello La Nina! What does this mean for the Atlantic ...
  • Daily Reading for Thursday, May 26th, 2016 HD Video
  • Daily Readings for Wednesday, May 25, 2016
  • Nun fatally attacked in South Sudan

Daily Readings

Reading 1, First Peter 1:10-16
10 This salvation was the subject of the search and investigation of the ... Read More

Psalm, Psalms 98:1, 2-3, 3-4
1 [Psalm] Sing a new song to Yahweh, for he has performed wonders, his ... Read More

Gospel, Mark 10:28-31
28 Peter took this up. 'Look,' he said to him, 'we have left everything ... Read More

Saint of the Day

Saint of the Day for May 24th, 2016 Image

St. David I of Scotland
May 24: David, the youngest son of Scotland's virtuous ... Read More