Beauty is in the eye of the beholder

Have you ever really thought about that? I'm talking about the heading above. I suppose once you become a spouse and parent the whole "eye of the beholder" thing has some relevance. In my eyes, there is nothing more beautiful on this planet than my husband and our three children.

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LOS ANGELES, CA - I learned last month exactly what the term meant. Before our vacation, I beheld myself in a very critical light. I told myself that I would start a serious healthy eating and exercise program before Thanksgiving.

'If I can do that,' I told myself, 'then I'll be well on my way to losing five or ten pounds for the cruise in January.'

It sounded good. October slipped into November and December, however; and while my intentions were noble, my habits were not. So at some point in January (after Christopher and Jim's birthdays), I resigned myself to simply maintaining my current weight.

Isn't it funny that when you're a few pounds (or 15 or 20 pounds) heavier than you'd ideally like to be everyone on a cruise ship looks perfect? But as my dear friends reminded me.no matter how thin you are, you always want to be thinner. I stopped worrying about the way I looked in a bathing suit, and opened my eyes to the beauty that surrounded me. With a ship that carried 2,000 passengers and a crew of nearly 1,000, sights to behold were around every corner.

Of course, the obvious beauty pretty much knocks you upside the head. Perfectly proportioned and tanned bodies paraded around the Promenade deck, preferring to soak in the sun while I soaked up the atmosphere. Once I got over the lack of cellulite, I began to really look.and see.

There was the beautiful family I noticed at breakfast on the first full day of the cruise. A mom, dad and 1.2 kids, with dark hair and big, dark eyes. At least they were beautiful until the little guy threw his plate of eggs on the floor. As much as I adore our children, I will never take them on a week-long cruise. The idea is stress-free vacation.

A couple of more days into the trip I began to notice the less obvious but equally amazing beauty. One has to look a little deeper to find something other than physical beauty. Our waiter was a lovely, gentle man from Haiti. Arnold had intensely dark skin, which was in direct contrast to his dazzling white smile. His heart was as warm as his skin, and his personality as bright as his grin.

An Italian family of probably ten or twelve was on board for a week of fun and sun. A woman of 50 or so years, tall and slender with salt and pepper hair, stood elegantly behind a wheelchair, and searched for a table that was close enough for "Mama" to walk back and forth from the buffet line. Another member of her family, an older gentleman, had more hair on his eyebrows than I have on my head. It wasn't his overabundance of facial hair that I noticed at first, though-it was his deep concern and love for the matriarch of the family.

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One evening, very late, when most of the senior crowd was fast asleep on mint-garnished pillows, I found two grandmothers in their 70s or 80s, dancing with the youngsters as an island band played the Macarena on the Lido deck.

A delightful young woman in her early 20s was our tour guide on the island of St. Lucia.
Physically she was very striking, but her innocence and kind soul revealed the truer beauty. The native St. Lucian captured the attention of the Americans and Canadians on the bus, and pointed out the Hess Oil Refinery and the flowers and trees indigenous to the island. Hannah explained why cows and goats were tied to trees along the side of the road (they were being fattened for Christmas dinner), and even taught us some of the native language. Evidently, the crowd on the bus learned quickly, and she applauded our efforts.

'I want to give you all the clap,' Hannah declared, clapping her hands in appreciation of her brilliant tourists. The bus erupted in laughter, and our friend, Bill, had to lean over and explain Hannah's amusing choice of words. The poor child bowed her head in embarrassment. In our eyes, though, her innocence was more beautiful than any blue-green ocean or exotic flower could ever be.

The entire trip was a feast for the senses, especially the eyes. The warm weather rejuvenated my spirit and the natural beauty of the islands was a welcome break in the middle of a Midwestern winter. As much fun as we had on that relaxing vacation, though, the welcoming sight of our home and our children snug in their beds was probably the most beautiful thing I'd seen all week. I learned it often takes a few days away from everyday beauty to truly appreciate it.

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