'Stand Up Girl' gives options for facing unexpected pregnancy

TORONTO, Canada (Catholic Register) -- For someone dealing with an unexpected pregnancy, there is a book that can help with the countless questions. Becky Fraser in Stand Up Girl: Take Charge of Your Unexpected Pregnancy (Servant Publications, Cincinnati, Ohio, 2005, 172 pp., $12.99, paper) poignantly speaks about how to take charge of an unexpected pregnancy.

Written as though you are sitting down for a chat with an old friend, Stand Up Girl speaks directly to the expectant mother. Becky Fraser shares her own story of dealing with an unexpected pregnancy, offering her experience as a learning tool and a source of hope and enlightenment. She talks about her feelings: "I was embarrassed and fearful; I had a constant knot in my stomach," and how she overcame them, reassuring the reader along the way. The book offers guidance about doing one of the most difficult things when dealing with an unexpected pregnancy: breaking the news to your boyfriend, parents or friends. The useful advice offers other options to letting them know, like calling from a friend's house or writing a letter. However, Stand Up Girl loses sight of the many times breaking the news is not a story with a happy ending and it neglects to mention some of the possible negative results, such as violent situations or homelessness. Stand Up Girl promises to "give you honest, factual insight into the world of pregnancy and reveal options you might not realize you have." At a time when a reader's vision may be clouded by hormones, emotions and anxiety, the book does a good job at listing and analyzing the options when faced with an unexpected pregnancy. Options of keeping the baby, marrying the baby's father and adoption are delved into comprehensively, focusing on the positive. Yet these options are presented in a way that may be misleading. In the chapter, "Keeping the Baby on Your Own," the author states, "There are thousands of women who have raised their child on their own and for the most, it has worked out." This ignores some pretty alarming facts: 63 percent of youth suicides are from fatherless homes (source: U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, Bureau of the Census). 85 percent of all youths sitting in prisons grew up in a fatherless home (source: Fulton County, Ga., jail populations, Texas Department of Corrections, 1992). Are these examples of situations where an absent father was "working out?" The option of abortion, on the other hand, is written about in morbid detail. You may find yourself gagging and turning away from the pages of Stand Up Girl as it describes the methods of abortion in such a way it appears to be used as a scare tactic rather than a source of information. A "just-the-facts" approach may have been more effective. The chapter on adoption is effective in portraying opposite views on the issue, explaining the pain of "giving up" your baby. But, it makes light of this option in contrast to abortion. The chapter describes adoption as "a generous, selfless thing (that) won't be easy, but is such a beautiful gift." It explains the different types of adoption, giving examples of girls who have had closed and open adoptions. Stand Up Girl offers a step-by-step look at the baby's development, complete with small pictures of fetal development and insight into what to expect during pregnancy. I would strongly recommend Stand Up Girl to those dealing with an unexpected pregnancy. - - -

This article is republished with permission of The Catholic Register (www.catholicregister.org), the largest circulation Catholic newspaper in Canada, a Catholic Online Preferred Publishing Partner.

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Republished with permission by Catholic Online from The Catholic Register (www.catholicregister.org ), the largest circulation national Catholic newspaper in Canada, a Catholic Online Preferred Publishing Partner. To subscribe to The Catholic Register, click here.