Newlyweds Need to Get Over the Bumps in Marriage

January 22, 2011 - 2:59 PST

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
MEDIA ADVISORY

GLENVIEW, IL (January 22, 2011) - The below article, by Roxane B. Salonen,, is from the January-February 2011 issue of "Family Foundations," the publication of the Couple to Couple League International (CCL). CCL is the leading organization providing Natural Family Planning (NFP) instruction in the United States.

The article opened with a discussion of the importance of perseverance among newlyweds in working with each other's differences.

* * *

Staying the course in such matters is important, says veteran husband Michael Castagno of East Norriton, Pa. "Marriage is really about being preoccupied with the welfare of the other person," he said.

Sixteen years of marriage and three daughters have all helped Michael refine his sentiments. Now he and his wife, Lisann, share the beauty of marriage and natural family planning with couples throughout the Philadelphia archdiocese as a witness couple for the Couple to Couple League. But they didn't arrive at that point overnight. It took plenty of disagreements and doubts to get there.

Walked Out of Class

Though Lisann now considers NFP "the best kept secret," when she was first introduced to it during marriage preparation, she walked out on the first class. "I told Michael, 'You're Crazy. We can't do this!' And he said to me, 'Let's give it a chance.'"

Irregular cycles that didn't seem amenable to charting formed the basis of her resistance, until she realized what she had learned in her classes had been played out in her cycles. "I figured if they were right about that, they might be right about the rest of it, too."

In those early years, Michael yearned for a big family while Lisann had two children fixed in her mind. But a cancer scare following the birth of their second daughter helped her become open to another child.

These are the earth-shaking, eye-opening moments you cannot anticipate when you first marry, Lisann said. You can only embrace them when they come. "I found out I didn't have cancer and was pregnant all within a day."

Lisann emerged from the dizzying ordeal with an opened mind and heart. "We call our youngest daughter our miracle baby. Now people ask if we're going to go for the fourth. We never say 'never,' even though people seem shocked to hear that."

Michael added, "You realize quickly that it's really not about putting a number on it but about life circumstances and ongoing prayerful discernment."

In their witness talks, Michael addresses how the characteristics NFP builds, like self-mastery and self-sacrifice, are virtues society celebrates for their character-building qualities. "There's really something to be said for mutual self-sacrifice toward a common goal."

Lisann approaches the role her husband has assumed in their practice of NFP. "Michael does all the charting," she said. "He asks about my temperature and cervical mucus daily, and though that might not sound too romantic, it really is, because he cares enough about me to do this. He's interested in it and knows what I'm going through every day."

Postpartum Depression a Mental Illness

Newlyweds can be assured that such comfortable patterns and easy compatibility are entirely attainable - and a few rough patches along the way do not preclude progress. Sometimes they spur it.

Lisann now attributes some of her early marital trials to postpartum depression, which Smith-Hanen classifies as a significant mental illness - and nothing to feel guilty about. The Catholic counselor said it merits immediate professional help, plus a mindfulness of moving forward. "Once a woman has had post partum depression, the likelihood of recurrence with subsequent deliveries is between 30 to 50 percent," Smith-Hanen said.

But at the time Lisann was experiencing postpartum depression, she didn't have that clinical label - just a burning awareness that she could not keep up with the growing demands of being a new mother, wife, and teacher.

"She finally just exploded one day and said, 'I can't do this anymore!'" Michael recalled. The rude awakening helped them both realize that even small concerns need to be voiced early on, before they erupt into something big.

They also came to realize their busy social life didn't have to cease, as they'd assumed in the first weeks of parenthood. "Babies are resilient," Michael said, adding that toting along the folding crib helped with napping needs. "We often look at the calendar now and realize we have nothing on Sunday and we're actually glad.... For the most part, our social life is not wanting at all."

Natural Family Planning Classes Taught

Classes in Natural Family Planning sponsored by the Couple to Couple League (CCL) are taught in 17 locations in the Chicago metro area, including southeast Wisconsin and northwest Indiana. The next series of classes will begin Friday, Feb. 4, at Holy Family Hospital, 100 North River Road, Des Plaines IL, taught by Matthew and Anne McClure.

Classes will also begin Sunday, Feb. 6th, 2011, at 1:30 pm, at Resurrection Medical Center, 7435 West Talcott Avenue, Chicago IL, taught by Dave and Mona Cattapan.

To register, and for a list of classes throughout the U.S., go to CCL International at www.ccli.org, (800) 745-8252. Chicago area NFP information is at www.naturalfamilyplanningchicago.com.

The method taught is the Sympto-Thermal Method, which is also taught via CylePRO software. Sign up for a membership with the Couple to Couple League International at www.ccli.org, and receive "Family Foundations."

Contact

Couple to Couple League of Chicago
http://www.naturalfamilyplanningchicago.com
IL, 60025 US
Monica Cassidy - , (800) 745-8252

Keywords

newlyweds,marriage,natural,family,planning,nfp,ccl,couple,league,Chicago

Category

OTHER

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