By Catholic Online (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
2/5/2014 (1 year ago)
Catholic Online (www.catholic.org)
With the heightened awareness of the sexual abuse of children, the question arises: How do these inhuman monsters gain access to children? Gregory M. Weber, Assistant Attorney General for the State of Wisconsin, says that the process involves "grooming" the intended victim - in addition to his parents and caregivers. "He'll gain the child's trust, break down his defenses, and manipulate him into performing or permitting the desired sex act," Weber says.¬†
LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - "The process is called grooming. It increases the predator's access to his victim and decreases the likelihood of discovery," Weber adds.
Psychologist Anna C. Salter, an expert in the field of child sexual maltreatment say the process is a slow and gradual one. "The establishment (and eventual betrayal) of affection and trust occupies a central role in the child molester's interactions with children . The grooming process often seems similar from offender to offender, largely because it takes little to discover that emotional seduction is the most effective way to manipulate children."
One convicted child abuser states it plainly: "[P]arents are so naive-they're worried about strangers and should be worried about their brother-in-law. They just don't realize how devious we can be. I used to abuse children in the same room with their parents and they couldn't see it or didn't seem to know it was happening."
Carry a reminder of Our Savior with us always!
He explained his horrific modus operandi: "I was disabled and spent months grooming the parents, so they would tell their children to take me out and help me. No one thought that disabled people could be abusers."
He adds that parents must educate their children on such matters. "Parents shouldn't be embarrassed to talk about things like this-it's harder to abuse or trick a child who knows what you're up to."
In explaining the grooming process, Weber says that it "begins when the predator chooses a target area. He may visit places where children are likely to go: schools, shopping malls, playgrounds, parks, and the like. He may work or volunteer at businesses that cater to children. Other predators strike up relationships with adults who have children in the home-single parent families make particularly good targets."
Selecting a victim takes longer, and preys upon the child's special vulnerabilities. "Any child may be victimized. Not surprisingly, predators often target children with obvious vulnerabilities. A child who feels unloved and unpopular will soak up adult attention like a sponge. Children with family problems, who spend time alone and unsupervised, who lack confidence and self-esteem, and who are isolated from their peers are all likely targets.
Many molesters use a combination of forced teaming and charm. "They may offer to play games, give rides, or buy treats and gifts as tokens of friendship. They may offer drugs or alcohol to older children or teenagers. And they almost always offer a sympathetic, understanding ear."
The predator then adds an element of secrecy to the child. For example, they may say, "Here's some candy. But don't tell your friends because they'll be jealous, and don't tell your mother because she won't like you eating between meals."
This is then followed by threats. "If you tell your mother what happened, she'll hate you. It'll kill her. Or I'll kill her. Or I'll kill you."
The forging of an emotional bond through this process leads to physical contact. The first physical contact between predator and victim is often nonsexual touching designed to identify limits: an "accidental" touch, an arm around the shoulder, a brushing of hair.
The best way to recognize grooming behavior is to pay attention to your child and the people in your child's life. "When we blindly surrender responsibility for them to others without question, we invite trouble. Parents should know their child's teachers, coaches, day care providers, youth group leaders, and other significant adults in their lives. Make unannounced visits. Ask questions. Stay involved," Weber says. "And please - talk to your children."
Pope Francis calls for your 'prayer and action'...
By CNA/EWTN News
The World Meeting of Families event next month in Philadelphia aims to lead families to know their importance as a gift from God and to help them open their hearts to Jesus Christ, a priest involved in the event has said. Vatican City (CNA/EWTN News) - The family "is ... continue reading
By Kenya Sinclair (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
The website twinstrangers.com brought together 23-year-old Ambra and 33-year-old Jennifer in an astonishing doppleganger encounter. LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - 26-year-old Niamh Geaney joined forces with two friends to work on a project called Twin Strangers. ... continue reading
By Abigail James (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
During the upcoming Holy Year, Pope Francis will allow all priests to forgive women who seek absolution and have had abortions. The pope proceeds with his "year of mercy" by opening up this opportunity. LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - By expanding the number of ... continue reading
By Matt Hadro, CNA/EWTN News
A group representing Catholic students with intellectual disabilities is hoping a U.S. visit from Pope Francis could spark nothing less than a renaissance in Catholic education. Washington D.C. (CNA/EWTN) - "We hope that Pope Francis will further open up the ... continue reading
By Talia Ramos (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
David Finlayson and his 13-year-old son Charlie have a stronger bond now after the teen heroically saved his father from death following a terrible hiking accident. MUNTINLUPA, PHILIPPINES (Catholic Online) - The Finlayson father-son duo were on a two-week backpacking ... continue reading
By Atarah Haely (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
Most people think the wedding is perfect if everything they had planned for the event was successfully enacted - the dress, the entourage, the food, the music, etc. Couples spend a lot of time, effort and money just to make sure they will have that magical ceremony ... continue reading
By Nikky Andres (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
When families are devastated with unfortunate life events, children are sometimes positioned to become a collateral damage in an often overburdened foster care system. Safe Families for Children provides a much proper alternative. MUNTILUNLPA, PHILIPPINES (Catholic ... continue reading
By Talia Ramos (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
After his son requested a bigger model of Bumblebee, the famous yellow autobot from the blockbuster hit Transformers, one father went above and beyond to create a 16-foot-tall model. MUNTINLUPA, PHILIPPINES (Catholic Online) - When asked for a bigger Transformer toy, ... continue reading
By Atarah Haely (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
Costing them nothing, Philadelphia residents have received their own copies of "The Great Controversy," a Christian book analyzing the prophetic warnings of the Biblical end of times. The Christian book company was reportedly in ties with another company to print and ... continue reading
By Hannah Marfil (NEWS CONSORTIUM)
A five-year-old boy living in Scunthorpe, UK expressed an adorable reaction when his mother, Sarah Bromby, told him he would be a big brother soon. MUNTINLUPA, PHILIPPINES (Catholic Online) -The Blaze reports that the enthusiastic little boy asked his mother, "Is ... continue reading