More Than Traditional, It's True: A Call to Change the Way We Speak of Marriage

8/12/2012

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women, it can never be marriage. That's not bigotry or discrimination or hatred no matter what the world says. Leave the hyper-charged feelings aside for a moment: refusing to call a thing what it isn't is nothing but logical, reasonable, and factual.

For thousands of years human civilization has known that marriage is only between a man and a woman, as the foundation of society, ordered toward the raising of children, but now suddenly in our so-called enlightened age those of us who refuse to part with reason and morality are on the wrong side of history? Absurd.

So there's my two cents'. Fellow defenders of true marriage, choose your words wisely and well. Don't join the rest of the world in declaring what is true to be merely "traditional."

Our challenge is to be unafraid and resolute without ever abandoning love. That's not an easy task, and I admit I have failed often. We're not wielding weapons, and we don't seek destruction or discrimination.

For myself, I don't write with animosity or any desire to wound. But like so many others in America today, I won't be bullied into capitulation either. I won't forsake what I know is true. I won't call something that is not marriage, marriage. It's that simple.

For the sake of true marriage and the family, even though I'm getting quite sick of words, words, words... silence is not an option.

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Jennifer Hartline is a grateful Catholic, a proud Army wife and homeschooling mother of three children. She is a contributing writer for Catholic Online. Visit her online at Wake Up, Deborah!
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Pope Benedict XVI's Prayer Intentions for January 2013
General Intention: The Faith of Christians. That in this Year of Faith Christians may deepen their knowledge of the mystery of Christ and witness joyfully to the gift of faith in him.
Missionary Intention: Middle Eastern Christians. That the Christian communities of the Middle East, often discriminated against, may receive from the Holy Spirit the strength of fidelity and perseverance.

Keywords: marriage, tolerance, same-sex marriage, traditional marriage, Jennifer Hartline

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1 - 10 of 22 Comments

Beth
9 months ago
Thank you, Jason B.!
Jason B.
9 months ago
@Vance, "Sick homosexual perverts"? Really? You do know that this is a catholic website, right? No matter how much you disagree with homosexuals, they are human beings are their intrinsic dignity must be upheld. CCC 2358 "The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. This inclination, which is objectively disordered, constitutes for most of them a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These persons are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and, if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition."
kathy
9 months ago
Personally, I am shocked at the great number of people who have caved to the social pressures of what the "New normal" supposedly is. Is it just easier to give in, and not step on anyones toes, in order to get along, or in order to seem that you are not racists or hateful or a biggot. Our faith and values have taken a back seat to pleasing man. The bible clearly tells us that we cannot serve two Gods. We are caught in the throws of having to keep our mouths shut in order to keep our jobs, our friends, our family members happy and without conflict. I live in a large Baptist environment, and I am amazed at just because the Presidents views have "evolved", theirs seems to be doing so also. We need to take heed, and believe the bible, when it tells us that few will enter the kingdom of heaven.
Judy Claar
9 months ago
Hi Vance: I usually, as you know, like Jo Ann, disagree with getting on any leaders of the Church. I still do. However, I am wondering if there is something wrong with me, as I am beginning to share (a wee bit) in your frustration. Pope Benedict has made a stand. While a few others have voiced their opinion But it is the lack of the greater majority: priests, Bishops, Cardinals in authority, particulary with an election coming up, that I would think they would be a bit more vocal. Especially from the pulpit. The pulpit is where most hear about the Catholic Church. You wrote a very good post explaining what the Bishops and priests, could and could not do. I think that it is the lacking of what they can do or say, that is what concerns me. Obey authority in everything except sin. That seems easy enough. Obama=Abortion=Murder=Sin. But perhaps Church leaders would enter a slippery slope...Or not...with Journalists, people? It seems like since the HHS Mandate got put on hold for a year, everyone is hush hush. I do not think it should be that way...but what do I know? Nothing.
Evening Blessings...
Vance
9 months ago
Yes, we need to address Marriage as what it is, Holy Sacrament of Matrimony. This world belongs to he who made - God. I could care less what an atheist or a sick homosexual pervert has to say because they didn't create this world. It is God who we serve and obey. I just wish that the majority of Bishops and priests would get on board defending the Holy Sacrament they volunteered to serve.
Juneau Alaska
9 months ago
It seems to me that if people of faith want to have the privilege of having their marriages recognized by the State, then they must follow the same civil rules against discrimination. -Mike
robert matzinger
9 months ago
We are in an entirely new era: one in which even the word "marriage" as described by the president of the United States now has no meaning. We used to think of marriage as that one of a union between a male and a female. Now, according to President Obama, that is not true. According to him, "marriage" is now between a man and a woman, a man and a man, and woman and a woman and that there is no difference. That there is no difference between a man and woman creating children and having what we call a family, and a man and man raising children, etc. And of course there then must be no difference in sex between a male/female, a male/male, and a female/female - according to Obama and the democrats it's all the same. Obama has managed to take away not only from the Christain definition of marriage, but also from the long held traditional societal value held that the only marriage that is valid is one between a man and a woman. Obama has managed to throw all that away and simply declare that "any" union between any people, male or female, can be considered "marriage," and therefor now the word "marriage" has no meaning whatsoever.

And the democratic party has now decided to endorse "gay" marriage in it's party platform. There once was a time, and not too long ago, that would have been thought unthinkable. Today, Obama and the democratic party are convinced that the majority of Americans agree with them: male/female, male/male, and female/female "marriage" is all the same, sex between them all is the same, etc. That there is no difference or advantage/disadvantage in the raising of children, whether biological or not, whether raised by male/female, male/male/ or female/female, that it is all the same.

And what will they declare next to be the same? What else will they attempt to destroy?
Greg
9 months ago
Hmmm, sounds very reasonable.

Men are not defined by sex. It is sex that is defined by men.

People who use "Birth Control" does not believe neither in birth nor in control, so why do they use these words?

How can they say "Equality in Marriage" when they are incapable of "Equality of Expressing it"?

I suspect God calls us back to His school...
Beth
9 months ago
Great article - an excellent point about the importance of words. Lately I have been seeing on my FB page many wall photos featuring Scripture verses that condemn other sins as punishable by death, advocate the subjugation of women to men, etc. - and people are using these as a means of discrediting Scripture on the issue of homosexuality. How do we respond to these arguments? (Please know that I am asking this sincerely, for I try to be a faithful Catholic.) I know we read Scripture differently from those who quote specific verses as the sole justification for their beliefs - but this makes it difficult for those of us who are Catholic to then defend our opposition to calling same-sex relationships "marriages", b/c we are lumped into the same category as those who stand solely on Scripture - and also those who justify their hatred of homosexuals by quoting the Bible. Thoughts? Because I have many friends about whom I care very deeply who are on the "other side" of this issue - a few b/c they are gay, others just b/c they feel it is the "fair" and "just" thing to do.
Willem
9 months ago

Thank you for this well written article.
Agree completely that the word true is apt. True faith, true marriage, truely believing in traditional values set by the church of all times.
Brgds

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