ZEBULLON, NC (Catholic Online) - Even growing up Catholic, I'd never heard of Eucharistic adoration, let alone perpetual Eucharistic adoration. I'd be a married adult with children, by the time this devotion was introduced to me. At a parish in our old town, I signed up for an hour once a month. The commitment was easy and I relished the hour of silence, away from my busy household.  Imagine escaping the joyful noise of seven constantly chattering balls of energy for one whole hour of complete silence and peace.

A relocation and several years later, time before the Blessed Sacrament became more readily available. Our new parish added St. Joseph's chapel and a dear friend began to share her love for adoration. Initially, my interest was piqued by her thoughtful words and gentle encouragement to meet our Lord in this place.

But, many were the excuses I had for myself as to why becoming a regular adorer was simply out of the question. We lived too far away, I have too many family obligations to fulfill, my children are too young, and on and on. I decided adoration could wait until my children were grown and I had time to spare. God knows how busy I am, so surely He'll understand why He needs to wait until my life settles down a little, right?

Over the last few years, I experienced one personal cross after another which left me feeling depressed and at times hopeless. Although friends were supportive, I felt desperate for a safe place to cry out, to express my deepest hurt and anger. I wanted to cry out to God, to tell Him that I didn't want to continue, to beg Him to take away my sorrow. I needed a counselor, who would listen and offer me empathy. A friend, who would wipe away my tears and tell me that life was worth living.

That is when I began to run to adoration. Literally, I found every opportunity to make my way to one of three chapels in a 50 mile radius.  Those chapels became an oasis in my desert of pain and sadness. Once before the Blessed Sacrament, I dropped on my knees and offered Jesus my emptiness because I felt like there was nothing else I had left to give Him. Sometimes, I wept quietly throughout the hour, sometimes I begged repeatedly for relief, and sometimes I did little more than sit in complete silence waiting to "hear" something inspirational.

Every hour spent in adoration began to change my perspective. My sorrow didn't magically disappear, but I drove home each time infused with a sense of calm and peace. In time, Jesus filled up my emptiness with Himself. He healed my brokenness and renewed my soul. He strengthened me and uplifted my spirits.

Still, I struggled with the idea of committing. I have all those good excuses, you know. Except there was that little "call" that wouldn't disappear. At first, I figured being a substitute seemed most appropriate because surely substitutes are needed. Then, each week the list came with all those empty time slots and that call simply grew louder.  A little like one of my children calling my name over and over and over again, only a bit less annoying.

As Divine Providence would arrange it, an unfilled time slot fit well in our family schedule, so I made the leap (for all of us). The first two weeks in adoration with our whole crew of seven children had me second-guessing myself and my sanity, but I offered that all to Jesus. Explaining to Him how much I missed our quiet time alone without a wiggly, whispering little one on my lap, I pledged to keep my promise of that weekly hour.

By week three, somethings began to change.  My children, even the under 10's began to quiet down, physically and vocally. How silly of me to ever doubt, Jesus' ability to calm all of the restless souls and to far exceed my expectations. He is, of course, the God Who told the raging storm to stop, so my 6 and 4 year olds can't be that much harder to control.

Our last holy hour, while my 6 year old knelt before our Lord, Jesus Christ in the monstrance, I glanced back to see my husband and our older children individually adoring. The 4 year old on my lap snuggled close and was awash in the peace of that chapel. The thought crossed my mind that I shouldn't have waited so long to make this commitment, but thankfully Jesus is patient and He didn't stop calling me.

Is He calling you?

Give God an inch, He'll carry you for a mile...and beyond

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Tara K. E. Brelinsky is a home schooling mother of seven living children, with six more heavenly ones who intercede (and a little soul expected to arrive in August). Married to her childhood sweetheart, they make their home in North Carolina where they teach Natural Family Planning, grow a garden, raise two dogs, a cat, a fish, ducks, roosters and a flock of hens (in addition to all those wonderful kids). Tara studied journalism a lifetime ago in college, but now she writes simply for the the glory of God. You can read more of her musings and inspirations on her blog "Blessing In Brelinskyville" (www.http://brelinskyville.blogspot.com/).