Perfect love never divulges the "why" behind a nickname

"Love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs . . . love always protects, always trusts, always, hopes, always preservers. Love never fails."

It seems there is always some benefit to helping kids with their homework. Recently my son was preparing a report on Rudyard Kipling and had left his books on the floor near the computer. When I sat down to get some time writing while he was busy, I picked up a book and noticed a drawing of Kipling's wife, Carrie. The picture intrigued me so I decided to read a little of their history. I read the words of Henry James, who had given the bride away: "She is a hard devoted capable little person whom I don't in the least understand his marrying."

How nice, I thought -- and that, from the man who gave her away!

Her daughter's description was no better, describing her mother as moody and difficult, often filling those around her with her own tensions. Ouch! Certainly, my own children wouldn't be so harsh! Or would they? I had never really stopped to wonder how anyone would describe me in writing had they the reason or opportunity to do so, especially those who lived with me. Would I see myself in the picture their words would paint or would I deny the negatives - and most certainly there would be negatives -- by virtue of their lack of objectivity?

Surely, my oldest wouldn't refer to my hysterical outbursts when he arrived home three hours past curfew as some obsessive compulsive psychological parenting disorder! And what about those (very) infrequent and inspired forays into four letter words or the (few) times I locked myself in the bathroom to maintain my sanity. Would they paint me as a woman on the edge?! Then there are the nicknames - Penguin, Scar Belly, the Heater. Certainly, no self-respecting son would divulge the source of such potentially damaging nomenclature! What an awful thought.

My life is flashing before my eyes and I can only hope my children saw the same movie I see! But as parents we all know that kids and adults don't see the same things in the same way, and that's OK because our motivations for doing things are not the same. Hopefully, as adults, our ability to love is more perfected than our children's ability to love and so we will be able to act out of a love that is not, as Scripture says, "self-seeking."

Being a firm parent who sets limits and has expectations is not the same as the rude, angry parent who ridicules or curses at children just to vent their own frustrations. Being a loving, affirming parent is not the same as being the over-indulgent parent who encourages their children's own self-seeking in the process.

As we mature, emotionally and spiritually, our ability to love should come closer to the love described by St. Paul - love that is patient, kind, that protects, perseveres and never fails, love that is not proud or rude but rejoices always with truth; love that hopes.

This kind of love is no small order - whether we are parent, spouse, friend or simply Christian in a world that doesn't seem to know Christ very well. It is difficult, sometimes seemingly impossible, but it is the perfect love to which God calls us and that which God modeled for us in Jesus. If we live in this love, make it a part of our lives and our hearts, we can be sure that nothing that is ever written about us will give us cause for embarrassment. That is unless someone decides to explain our nicknames!

__________________________________

Mary Morrell is the author of Angels in High Top Sneakers from Loyola Press.

Contact

Diocese of Metuchen
http://diometuchen.org NJ, US
Mary Morrell - Associate Director, Office of Religious Education, 732 562-1990

Email

mmorrell@diometuchen.org

Keywords

love

More Catholic PRWire

Showing 1 - 50 of 4,716

• « Prev
• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5
• 6
• 7
• 8
• 9
• Next »

A Recession Antidote
Randy Hain

Monaco & The Vatican: Monaco's Grace Kelly Exhibit to Rome--A Review of Monegasque-Holy See Diplomatic History
Dna. Maria St. Catherine Sharpe, t.o.s.m., T.O.SS.T.

The Why of Jesus' Death: A Pauline Perspective
Jerom Paul

A Royal Betrayal: Catholic Monaco Liberalizes Abortion
Dna. Maria St.Catherine De Grace Sharpe, t.o.s.m., T.O.SS.T.

Embrace every moment as sacred time
Mary Regina Morrell

My Dad
JoMarie Grinkiewicz

Letting go is simple wisdom with divine potential
Mary Regina Morrell

Father Lombardi's Address on Catholic Media
Catholic Online

Pope's Words to Pontifical Latin American College
Catholic Online

Prelate: Genetics Needs a Conscience
Catholic Online

State Aid for Catholic Schools: Help or Hindrance?
Catholic Online

Scorsese Planning Movie on Japanese Martyrs
Catholic Online

2 Nuns Kidnapped in Kenya Set Free
Catholic Online

Holy See-Israel Negotiation Moves Forward
Catholic Online

Franchising to Evangelize
Catholic Online

Catholics Decry Anti-Christianity in Israel
Catholic Online

Pope and Gordon Brown Meet About Development Aid
Catholic Online

Pontiff Backs Latin America's Continental Mission
Catholic Online

Cardinal Warns Against Anti-Catholic Education
Catholic Online

Full Circle
Robert Gieb

Three words to a deeper faith
Paul Sposite

Relections for Lent 2009
chris anthony

Wisdom lies beyond the surface of life
Mary Regina Morrell

World Food Program Director on Lent
Catholic Online

Moral Clarity
DAN SHEA

Pope's Lenten Message for 2009
Catholic Online

A Prayer for Monaco: Remembering the Faith Legacy of Prince Rainier III & Princess Grace and Contemplating the Moral Challenges of Prince Albert II
Dna. Maria St. Catherine Sharpe

Keeping a Lid on Permissiveness
Sally Connolly

Glimpse of Me
Sarah Reinhard

The 3 stages of life
Michele Szekely

Sex and the Married Woman
Cheryl Dickow

A Catholic Woman Returns to the Church
Cheryl Dickow

Modernity & Morality
Dan Shea

Just a Minute
Sarah Reinhard

Catholic identity ... triumphant reemergence!
Hugh McNichol

Edging God Out
Paul Sposite

Burying a St. Joseph Statue
Cheryl Dickow

George Bush Speaks on Papal Visit
Catholic Online

Sometimes moving forward means moving the canoe
Mary Regina Morrell

Action Changes Things: Teaching our Kids about Community Service
Lisa Hendey

Easter... A Way of Life
Paul Spoisite

Papal initiative...peace and harmony!
Hugh McNichol

Proclaim the mysteries of the Resurrection!
Hugh McNichol

Jerusalem Patriarch's Easter Message
Catholic Online

Good Friday Sermon of Father Cantalamessa
Catholic Online

Papal Address at the End of the Way of the Cross
Catholic Online

Cardinal Zen's Meditations for Via Crucis
Catholic Online

Interview With Vatican Aide on Jewish-Catholic Relations
Catholic Online

Pope Benedict XVI On the Easter Triduum
Catholic Online

Holy Saturday...anticipation!
Hugh McNichol

• « Prev
• 1
• 2
• 3
• 4
• 5
• 6
• 7
• 8
• 9
• Next »